Asking for Help

I have been thinking about this a lot lately - I do believe one of the most difficult realizations I have made in moving to Denmark is the necessity of having to ask for help. It has been very, very hard for me.

I did just talk about it the other day at work with my coworker Thomas. We were discussing something, and he said, "That is really hard for you, isn't it?" (meaning to ask for help). I told him yes.

Rachel and I spoke about it the other day too, and she made a very poignant comment - she asked if I thought we would ever not need to ask for help here. I think that once we fluently know the language, that will help a lot. But because processes and procedures are so different here (if you are going to the emergency room, you have to call before you go...that sort of thing), I don't think I will ever be completely self-sufficient in Denmark.

It is a very humbling thing to be in a foreign world and to have to depend on others for help. Even though most every Dane does speak English...I still come across something almost every day that I don't understand and have to ask about.

I have been in the process of moving to a new apartment - and will actually be sleeping there tomorrow. My good friend Susanne just came out and asked me if Monday was a good day for me, for her to help me. She has a car with a tow hitch, so she can help me move all the big things I have to buy at Ikea. What is amazing about her is I didn't even ask her for help. She probably realized I wouldn't ask - and she stepped up to the plate and offered anyway. This is something we have discussed before, and she knows that it is hard for me!

I do think my biggest issue with asking for help is that I feel like I am not independent - almost as if I am weak, and I have to rely on someone or something. I don't enjoy that. For example, every step of my moving process has (thankfully) been assisted by a Danish friend in one sense or another. Back home, I would just load up my car and make a few trips and try to do it on my own. Not having a car doesn't help the scenario, plus most cars are small here...so small that you need to rent a trailer to move anything of substantial size. I do realize this is something I need to work on.

Well, more about the move later. That is my provacative thought for the day!